Flirting With Lesbians….and more

Posts tagged ‘meet lesbians’

Q: Wrong or Crazy Part II

Q

First let me begin by saying that I appreciate your honesty and candor..both
good and bad points..you are very special indeed..and its almost Kismet that
I was “guided” towards you..

Yes, I am married, but my husband, for years has always told me to “go and
get a girlfriend”, but I truly feel its a male ego thing about “two women
getting it on”. If I were to have a relationship I would want it to be for me
and me alone..discreet..something for me to treasure..I know..too idealist
huh??? Am I living in dreamland to think I can live a duo life? I know people
who do and are very happy..

I will say that I did get a little scared about “witches and bitches”, but then
again when you put it in perspective, aren’t  men that way also??? “Same game, different actors”..Just know that your  previous relationships are no different than men/women one..

I am glad that you have found security and inner peace with your
life-partner, and I wish you happiness and joy and all that you could ever hope
for..

Thanks again for taking time out for a complete stranger..I truly appreciate
it..

A

When I originally posted the flirting 101 site, I hadn’t expected to get letters.
But I respect that it takes a big risk to reach out to someone, and that the issues we face as women, as lesbians, as bis, as whatever and where ever we are in our lives, deserves a respectful and honest answer.

Of course, I’ve had a few off colour e-mails, and they just get a “thank you
for the offer, but, as I said on the site, I am not available for personal
encounters.”

I know that some people come out thinking that the gay community is this all
embracing, friendly place, and it can be. But there are bad parts too, as you
need to go in with eyes and ears open. The ones to avoid make themselves
pretty obvious.

You husband is, at least on the surface, okay with your feelings. So, take that
as permission and go out there. And don’t tell him, don’t introduce him to the
new women in your life.

This is about your feelings, not his genetically programmed fantasy of
watching two girls perform for him.

Don’t hold yourself back with regrets of shoulda, woulda, coulda, you made
the best choices that you could at the time, in those moments. You don’t get
any do overs, just do next’s.

What’s important now, is how you go on with your life.

You just need to give yourself permission now.

Q: How Do I Become a Lesbian?

Q:
Age 42 and tired of dead end relationships with men. Decided 6 months ago to
become a Lesbian Now just trying to find a nice woman for my first experience. How do I flirt?

A:
The first issue I see isn’t how to flirt.

No one is going to respond to any sort of flirting, no matter how seductive, funny or clever, if they think that they are the fall back choice. Or, as I prefer in horse track parlance – an “also ran”.
Women are lesbians because they identify emotionally and sexually with
women. It’s not an anti-man choice, it’s a pro-woman choice.

1. Are you actually sexually attracted to women and just never acted on it?
or
2. Are you just not going for the kind of guy who can give you what you want,
and giving up and going for women?

A lot of people make the mistake of deciding all the details of their future
relationship and then try to find someone to plug into that.

The person you date, regardless of gender, is going to have their own
relationship ideas. You can’t just make up a relationship by yourself and
expect someone else to just play along.

If you decide that you want to be with a woman because you like women and
not because you’re tired / bored / sick of men, then I suggest avoiding the
bars and finding a lesbian community centre, an organization or club, a local
queer newspaper or sports team and join it.

Make sure it’s a hobby or club of an interest you actually like.

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